


The sun and the Moon

by MJ1999



Category: Cats - Andrew Lloyd Webber, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats - T. S. Eliot
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:55:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 17
Words: 14,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25657024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MJ1999/pseuds/MJ1999
Summary: What would happen if Munkustrap was killed in that fateful fight with Macavity?After the Jellicles lose two treasured souls in one night, the junkyard is plunged into mourning. With no other heirs, Tugger steps up to take a leadership role. But being a Jellicle leader is hard. And raising your deceased brother’s kitten? Even harder.Not to mention, with Munkustrap out of the way, a certain "Hidden Paw" has one less thing to worry about.
Relationships: Demeter/Munkustrap (Cats), Jellylorum & Skimbleshanks (Cats)
Comments: 31
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

As Macavity slashed at Munkustrap, the Jellicle protector was sent flying with such force that any regular cat couldn’t muster with a simple scratch.

Gathering his courage, Alonzo sprung into action and leapt onto Macavity’s back, distracting him enough for Demeter to run away and hide.

The rest of the Jellicles joined the fight, ganging up on Macavity and backing him up against a car.

With nowhere to go, Macavity looked around for anything that could help him. He spotted two jumper cables. He could  _ feel  _ the electricity pulsing through them. In one swift motion, he grabbed the cables and brought them together, creating a shock that blew out every light in the yard. Weakened and unable to use his magic because of it, Macavity took advantage of the darkness and fled through the crowd of advancing Jellicles.

One of the cats grabbed a flashlight and shone it around the junkyard, looking for Macavity. Nothing. No trace.

“Macavity’s… Not there!” all the Jellicles gasped in unison.

It was silent for a moment before the Jellicles began their panicked chatter.  _ What would they do? _ And,  _ Where was Old Deuteronomy? _ And,  _ Would Macavity come back for Demeter? _

“Everyone!” Alonzo spoke up over the voices, “Please, remain  _ calm _ . For now, we are safe. Munkustrap will know what to do. Munk?”

But there was no response.

“Where is Munkustrap?” Jennyanydots asked, trying to see.

“Did Macavity take him too!?” Etcetera piped up, scared.

“Papa?” Jemima crept out of her hiding spot with Demeter. Oddly, Jemima was born with an unnatural ability to see in the dark much better than other cats can. She trotted over to where Munkustrap still lay, unmoving. She jumped up onto his back, pulling at one of his ears with her teeth.

Nothing.

Alonzo took the flashlight and shone it towards Munkustrap, prompting gasps and horrified screams from the tribe.

Munkustrap was lying there, still, in a slowly growing puddle of blood! Demeter gasped and quickly snatched Jemima away, letting out a muffled sob as she held her daughter close and ran off back to their den.

The elders of the tribe acted quickly, rolling Munkustrap onto his back. Across his belly was a large, deep gash. Little red sparks danced around the wound, as a reminder of who had caused it.

“Skimble,” Jellylorum called to her mate, “Take Etcetera back to the den.”

“Yes, and please, take Electra with you as well,” Jennyanydots added.

Skimbleshanks gathered up his crying daughters and ushered them back to the den, shielding their eyes from the terrible sight.

Asparagus Jr. followed behind with Pouncival and Tumblebrutus, who were inconsolable.

  
Rum Tum Tugger, who had been watching all of this go down, was in shock. He sat there, frozen, speechless. As the realization washed over the tribe that Munkustrap was dead, so too did it wash over Tugger. His big brother, the cat who had been by his side his whole life, who he looked up to, who he loved… Was  _ dead _ . A tear rolled down his cheek. Then another, then another. By the time he had torn his way down the trash pile he sat atop, he was a sniffling, sobbing mess. He fell over Munkustrap, gathering him in his arms. He hugged him close and let out a scream of pure agony. The rest of the tribe was silent as Tugger’s howl echoed around them, filling the quiet night.


	2. Chapter 2

The next evening, Munkustrap’s funeral was simple and quiet. Munkustrap had always told Tugger that he wanted to be laid to rest with dignity and grace. So as the sun began to set over London, the tribe took Munkustrap to the back of the junkyard and lowered him into a hole that had been dug not long before. The kittens, save for Victoria, had stayed back, being watched by Jennyanydots, who had said her goodbyes before the funeral.

Tumblebrutus and Pouncival sat on the floor in a tangle of yarn. “Is Munkustrap going to go to the Heaviside Layer?” Pouncival asked.

Jenny paused her knitting, not expecting the tom kitten to ask such a question. She thought for a moment. She’d never really considered what happens when a cat dies before being the Jellicle Choice. Finally, she spoke. “Well, Pouncie… The truth is… I don’t… Really know that.”

“But you’re a grownup, mama,” Electra piped up, hopping onto the small couch which was fashioned out of cushions, “Grownups know _every_ thing!”

Jenny chuckled at her daughter’s innocence. “We don’t know everything, dear. _Nobody_ knows _every_ thing.”

“Old Deuteronomy does!” Etcetera said excitedly.

Jenny flinched, hearing the old cat’s name. After searching for him, Alonzo and Plato had found him dead, with the same wound as Munkustrap, red sparks dancing around the wound. _Macavity_. “Old… Old Deuteronomy was indeed wise. But even he didn’t know everything. I remember, when I was just a kitten, I asked him, ‘Old Deuteronomy? What is in the Heaviside Layer? What is it like there?’ And he told me, ‘Why, I don’t know! But you know… Sometimes it’s fun. Not knowing things. A little bit of mystery keeps life interesting.’ ” she did her best deep voice when speaking for Old Deuteronomy.

“ _You_ were a _kitten!?_ ” Tumblebrutus laughed, “But you’re so _old!_ ”

Jenny couldn’t help but smile. “Yes, I suppose I am. But _every_ cat was once a kitten.”

“Was Munkustrap a kitten?” Etcetera asked.

“Yes, yes, Munkustrap was once a kitten, just like _you_.” Jenny booped Etcetera on the nose. She thought back to the night Munkustrap was born.

***

The night Munkustrap was born, Jenny had been there for the birth. She was much younger, of course, having just finished her training with Jellylorum. She held Grizabella’s paw, giving her soft encouragement and making sure she kept her breathing steady.

“We’re almost there. Keep going, Grizzie,” Jellylorum encouraged, “One or two more pushes.”

With a scream, Grizabella pushed one final time, bringing her son into the world. She breathed heavily and looked at Jellylorum through hooded eyes, smiling.

Jelly and Jenny held the kitten for a moment before handing him to Grizabella.

Grizabella looked down at her son, and she felt her heart swell with pride.

“It’s a boy,” Jelly declared.

“A healthy baby boy!” Jenny added excitedly.

Grizabella hugged her son to her chest, listening to his mews. “Please, fetch Deut.”

Jelly nodded. “Stay here, Jenny, and keep an eye on them,” she instructed as she made her way out into the sitting area of her den.

Skimbleshanks, who was Jenny’s mate at the time, not Jelly’s, was there with Old Deuteronomy, keeping an eye on Macavity, Old Deuteronomy’s first son who was now only a kitten. It was a strict rule in Jellylorum’s household that no toms were allowed in while a queen was giving birth.

Old Deuteronomy’s head whipped around to look at Jelly. “Is it over? Are they here?” he asked.

“Yes, yes!” Jelly replied happily, “Come. Meet your son.”

“My son! Another boy!” Old Deuteronomy’s eyes sparkled with pride. He would have been just as happy to have a girl, but something in his heart told him that this was meant to be. That his new son would achieve great things one day. He glanced down at Macavity. “Mac, would you like to go meet your baby brother?”

Macavity sat in Skimbleshanks’ lap on the couch, pouting with crossed arms. He shook his head. “I don’t _want_ a baby brother!”

“Oh, come now, lad!” Skimble laughed, “Having a little brother will be fun! When he’s old enough to run around and play, you’ll have a little friend! Being a big brother is a tough job, though. He’s going to look up to you. You have to set an example for him. Oh, I don’t know. Do you think he’s up to the job, Deut?”

Hearing Skimble tell him how much of a challenge being a big brother would be, he began to get excited. “I am! I can do it, I can do it!” He hopped off Skimble’s lap and struck a pose. “Imma be the bestest big brother _ever!_ ”

Old Deuteronomy looked at Skimble and chuckled, “I think he’s up to the job.” He took his son’s little paw and followed Jelly into the back room. Upon seeing Grizabella, Old Deuteronomy’s heart melted. She looked so beautiful, and he loved her so much.

“Hello, dear.” She smiled, beckoning him closer.

“ _Darling…_ ” Old Deuteronomy came to sit beside his mate, looking down at the little kitten in her arms. He was so tiny, with paws too big for his body. Perhaps he’d grow into them. When he laid eyes on his son, he was rendered speechless. The kitten was breathtaking. Silver, like his mother, with lovely black stripes. Old Deuteronomy wondered if his son would have amber eyes like himself or ice blue like his mother. Finally, he managed to form words. “My heart is… _Full…_ ”

“What will you name him?” Jenny asked.

Old Deuteronomy and Grizabella had thought long and hard about the name of their second son. They looked at Jenny and Jelly and said together, “Munkustrap.”

***

“Jenny?” Pouncival waved a paw in front of Jenny’s face. “Jen _nyyyy!_ ”

“Is she dead?” Etcetera asked, pulling on one of Jenny’s ears.

“Don’t say that…” Tumblebrutus said quietly.

“I was only kidding, Tumble-”

“Just don’t _say that!_ ” Tumble yelled, snapping Jenny out of her daze in the process.

“Oh! I’m sorry, dears! I was just… Remembering something…” Jenny sighed.

“‘Membering what?” Etcetera tilted her head.

Jenny paused. Should she tell them? She figured it couldn’t hurt. “I was remembering the night Munkustrap came to the tribe.”

“Where did he come from?” Electra asked innocently.

“Why, the Heaviside Layer, of course! Where all kittens come from! That’s where the previous Jellicle Choice is made into the kitten they will be reborn as!” Jenny had a lot of practice with that speech, as she was asked a similar question by many kittens in her day.

“Wait. So _I_ used to be someone _else?_ ” Etcetera gasped.

“Perhaps, perhaps.” Jenny smiled. This was nice. Just talking with the kittens. It was good to take her mind off the loss of her good friend. The tom she’d watched grow up into the powerful Jellicle protector she cared for so dearly. She then noticed that Jemima hadn’t spoken. She glanced down at the red and black kitten, who was sitting on the couch quietly, staring off into the distance. “Sillabub?” Jenny was partial to Jemima’s Jellicle name herself, so she used it as often as possible, so the kitten wouldn’t forget it as she got older. “What about you, dear? You’re awfully quiet.” Jenny said gently, resting a paw on her shoulder.

“Papa’s going to the Heaviside Layer…” was all she said.


	3. Chapter 3

Demeter sat with Tugger, next to the hole that had been dug for Munkustrap’s funeral. She watched as her mate, the tom she loved so dearly, was lowered into it. This wasn’t right. It felt too final. It felt like there should be something… Something  _ more. _ Some meeting, for her to say goodbye. But death isn’t like that. It’s fast, ruthless, and  _ terribly _ cruel. There was nothing to do other than accept it and move on. But Demeter couldn’t accept it. She  _ wouldn’t _ . As they began to lower Munkustrap into the hole, her heart broke all over again for her true love. She lunged forward and took his paw in hers, crying hysterically.

Alonzo and Plato stopped lowering Munkustrap for a moment. They figured they should just let her have this.

“Oh, no, no,  _ please! _ ’ Demeter sobbed, “Why?  _ Why _ , oh,  **_God!_ ** ” Her cries echoed in the night, just as Tugger’s had the night of the ball.

The other Jellicles stayed quiet, bowing their heads in respect, no one knowing what to do. Nobody moved. They weren’t sure whether to comfort her or let her cry.

But as Tugger stood there, staring at the ground, he’d had enough. Enough drawing out this painful process. Enough of hearing Demeter’s pained weeping. Gently, he put a paw on her shoulder and squeezed it comfortingly.

Demeter jumped, startled. She turned to Tugger, her eyes red and her cheek fur matted from her tears. She saw the look in Tugger’s eyes, full of pain and sorrow. But mostly, full of concern. She sighed, coming back to sit next to him. She rested her head on his shoulder, burying her face in his mane. She continued to cry, but quieter.

Alonzo and Plato shared a look before nodding to each other and continuing to lower Munkustrap into his grave.

Once they had finished, Alonzo stepped forward to say a few words. He cleared his throat. “I know it’s customary for the next of kin to say a few words at Jellicle funerals, but Tugger asked me to do this in his place. Munkustrap was… My best friend. He was a tom you could always count on. For  _ anything _ . He… Never broke a promise. And he always lifted you up when you needed it. I… I know  _ I  _ needed it,” he laughed lightly, “He helped me become more confident. He taught me how to see myself the way I suppose  _ he _ saw me. He was so, so strong, and brave. Even when he was scared! He’s the type of tom who never quit until the job was done. He was such a  _ good  _ tom. A kind protector, an amazing father, and a fantastic friend. I’ll…” He glanced behind himself at the grave. “I’ll miss you, you wonderful  _ bastard! _ ” he laughed, to lighten his spirits.

There was a silence after his last remark.

“I’m sorry. I suppose… Not all of you share our humour… That was inappropriate, I apologize.” Alonzo hung his head and retreated back to stand next to Plato.

The Jellicles had a moment of contemplative silence before Alonzo spoke up again. “Will a few of you come forward to help me bury Munkustrap?”

“ _ Wait! _ ” a tiny voice called.

“Sillabub, come back!” cried another, much older sounding voice.

Through the crowd of Jellicles came Jemima, being tailed by Jennyanydots. Jemima stopped in front of the grave. “Papa needs this!” She was holding a small blue blanket. It was Munkustrap’s baby blanket. The one he gave to Jemima when she was born. “He needs to take it with him to the Heaviside Layer! Maybe it’ll help him remember us when he gets to be reborn!” She looked at Demeter with her big, innocent brown eyes.

Demeter bit back a sob. She had to be strong for her daughter. She nodded and got down to Jemima’s level. “I think that’s a wonderful idea, Jemmy,” she said softly, “Would you like to give it to him together?”

Jemima nodded, smiling. She and Demeter both held the blanket and dropped it into the grave. It fell slowly, almost as if it were a feather, and landed on Munkustrap’s stomach, covering where his wound had been bandaged. “Bye bye, Papa,” Jemima whispered, “I’ll… I’ll miss you…” Her voice was shaky. She didn’t quite understand death yet. But she did know that she would never get to see her father again, and that made her sad. She crawled into Demeter’s arms and curled up against her chest. “Mommy? Can we go home?”

Demeter glanced down into the grave. She felt like she’d had enough for one day. She said her goodbyes. She nodded. “I think that’s a good idea, sweetheart. Let’s go home.” Before she left, she turned to Tugger and gave him a sympathetic look. “If you need anything, anything at all, please, don’t hesitate to come and see me.”

Tugger nodded. “Yeah. Thanks.”

And with that, Demeter turned and left.

The funeral wrapped up quickly. They filled in the grave, Jellicles said their goodbyes. Some said short prayers for Munkustrap’s safe journey to the Heaviside Layer and some left little gifts. Just tokens that reminded them of him, or things that he liked. When everyone had finished, they dispersed. Some went back to their dens in the junkyard, and some went back to their human homes. But Tugger stayed put. He sat next to Munkustrap’s grave for a little bit.

“Well, old chap…” he sighed, “You always have the answer. So… What do you suppose I do now?”


	4. Chapter 4

Over the next week or so, the junkyard was quiet. A lot of the Jellicles stayed in their homes with their owners, but the Jellicles who  _ did  _ visit the yard were sombre.

Alonzo would come around in the mornings and evenings to patrol the outskirts of the yard before disappearing until the next day.

Jellylorum and Jennyanydots made sure to come around, to be there as a support for any grieving Jellicles, and to support each other. Although, in their age, they’d seen many cats come, go, and die… They never thought they’d have to see Munkustrap, the tom they’d known since his kittenhood, pass on. And so young at that! When they weren’t out comforting the other Jellicles, they were curled up together in Jellylorum’s den. They didn’t talk. They just laid there together, being in the moment. Sometimes one would fall asleep and, not wanting to wake her, the other would lay there until sleep claimed her as well. Sleep, it seemed, was one of the only escapes from the grief.

Demeter and Jemima would come to the yard each day, and stay until the sun rose the next morning. Demeter wouldn’t do much. When you passed her, you’d often see her sunning herself on a tire, or staring into nothingness. You could only imagine what she was thinking about, because she wouldn’t tell you. On this particular day, Demeter was lying about on the hood of a car, swaying her tail as it hung over the side. It was one of those days where she would just worry, worry, worry. Worry about Jemima, worry about whether or not Macavity would return for her, worry about the future of the tribe. The Jellicles hadn’t appointed a new leader yet. Munkustrap was to fill that role when Old Deuteronomy stepped down. Now, with both of them gone, who would they turn to for guidance? Jemima was Munkustrap’s planned heir, if she agreed once she was older, of course. But for now, she was much too young to make that decision. They couldn’t go on like this for long. They  _ needed _ a leader. Just then, she heard a loud bang. Startled, she jumped up to see that Tugger had made a rather heavy landing on the hood.

“Penny for your thoughts?” he asked. He gave her a smile, but it lacked its usual cheekiness.

“ _ Everlasting _ , Tugger,” she sighed, “Don’t sneak up on me like that…”

“Sorry, sorry,” he chuckled, looking out at the junkyard.

Not far away, Pouncival, Etcetera, and Electra were playing. Jemima was with them, too, but she wasn’t participating much. Tugger had noticed her often with a faraway look in her eyes that he’d never seen before. No, definitely not. She hadn’t started acting this way until Munkustrap’s death.

Tugger looked back to Demeter. “How’s Jemima handling it?”

“She’s been… Asking me a lot of questions. Some that I can’t answer. ‘ _ Why did that bad cat try to take you? Why did he kill Papa?’ _ ” At that last one, Demeter’s voice broke a little bit. Tugger recognized this and curled his tail around her, pulling her close with one arm. “Other than that, she’s been very quiet. I don’t  _ make _ her talk to me. She’s very outspoken. If she wants to talk, she’ll talk.”

It was silent for another moment before Tugger spoke. “So… I’m… The leader now, I guess…”  
  
Demeter was taken aback. “ _You?_ Really!”

Tugger folded his ears. “What? Do you not think I can?”

“No, no, that’s not what I meant. You just never seemed…  _ Interested  _ in that. You seemed to enjoy just doing your own thing. Living the unexamined life.”

“Well someone has to do it and I’m not running away anymore. I’ve realized that I need to take a long, hard look at where my life is going.”

“Well,” Demeter sighed, “If that’s what will make you happy.”

Tugger didn’t answer. He just fluffed his mane and laid down.

  
Demeter put her head down and shut her eyes. Daytime was fine for Demeter. It didn’t feel as lonely as the night. She could nap in the day and be fine. It was when the sun went down that she struggled the  _ most _ .


	5. Chapter 5

Demeter and Munkustrap sat side by side in the long grass of a meadow full of daisies as the sun shone high in the sky, warming their fur. Demeter smiled and sighed deeply, laying her head over Munkustrap’s lap. “Mmm… This is nice…”

Munkustrap chuckled, leaning down to touch his nose to hers, his warm breath fanning her face in contrast to the cool breeze that blew through. “Comfy?” he asked.

Demeter nodded, opening her eyes to look into his ice blue ones. “You’re cozy.” She rolled in a little closer, taking one of his paws in hers and licking it. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” he replied, tilting his head slightly.

Not far away, Jemima hopped through the grass, chasing a pink butterfly. Occasionally, little giggles and playful growls could be heard.

Demeter smiled, sitting up to watch her. “She’s growing up so fast…”

“Yes…” Munkustrap agreed, “It’s been amazing to watch her become her own cat.”

“Munkustrap… Do you think… I’m a good mother?” Demeter inquired.

“‘Course. Why? Do you have doubts?” Munkustrap frowned slightly.

“Oh, just… I want to give her the best life I possibly can. I… I don’t want her to end up like…” Demeter paused. She was just about to say _her father_ . But Macavity _wasn’t_ Jemima’s father. Biologically, yes. But to Demeter, Munkustrap would _always_ be her father. “Like him. You know?”

Munkustrap understood now. He leaned over and rested his head on Demeter’s shoulder, nuzzling her. “Oh, Demi… I wouldn’t worry about that. Jemima is sweet, and kind, and _good_ . She’s nothing _like_ Macavity. After all. She’s got a little bit of _you_ in her. And I know it hurts… But you two will be just fine without me.”

“... _Without_ you? Whatever do you mean?” Demeter questioned, concerned. All of a sudden, she heard a small voice call out to her.

“Mommy!” It was Jemima. She looked to see Jemima bounding towards her through the flowers. When she looked back beside her, Munkustrap was gone.

***

“Mommy! Mommy!” Jemima whisper-yelled, shaking Demeter awake.

Demeter sat up with a start and looked around herself. She was in her den. It had only been a dream. She put a paw to her face. Her cheek fur was damp and matted. After a moment of processing where she was, she looked down at Jemima, who was staring up at her with big, innocent, concerned eyes. “... Y-yes, Jemmy?”

“You were crying,” was all Jemima said.

“Oh? Yes, I… Suppose I was…”

“Were you having a bad dream?” the little kitten asked.

“No… No, actually. It was actually a very nice dream.” Demeter smiled wistfully. She wasn’t sure how she dreamed up that field. She’d never been out of the city before. There were parks, of course, but she’d never been surrounded by _that_ much green.

“If it was a nice dream… Why were you crying?” Jemima climbed onto Demeter’s lap and touched the part of her face that her tears had dampened.

Demeter thought for a moment. How to explain this… “I was crying because… I wanted it to be real. But it wasn’t real. And I suppose that makes me a little bit sad.”

Jemima listened intently, nodding. “I had a good dream too! Maybe mine will make you happy!”

Demeter smiled. “Sure, Jemima. Let’s hear about your dream.”

“Wait!” Jemima hopped out of the nest and scurried to her own little one. She grabbed her stuffed kitty and brought it back over to Demeter’s nest, handing it to her mother. “If I’m going to tell you a bedtime story, you need to get tucked in! Lay down!” she demanded.

Demeter chuckled, obliging. She laid down and pulled her blanket up while Jemima tucked it underneath her.

“So,” Jemima said, sitting at the foot of the nest, “We were in a _biiiiig_ field of flowers! It was sunny and the grass was so soft, and smelled really _good!_ The flowers were liiiike… They had yellow in the middle? And white petals!”

“Daisies?” Demeter inquired.

“I guess so! There was this big pink butterfly! I tried to catch him but he was too fast… And I can’t fly…” Jemima’s ears drooped sadly, then perked up again. “And you and Papa were there too! You were far away, though. I couldn’t hear what you were saying. But you looked really happy.”

As Demeter listened, she began to tear up. But as sad as she felt, she was also confused. Had she and Jemima shared a dream?

As Jemima finished her story, she climbed into the nest and cuddled up with Demeter. Before drifting off to sleep, though, she asked a heartbreaking question. “Mommy? Can we go to that meadow?”


	6. Chapter 6

Tugger spent most of his days at the Junkyard. In the morning, he would go sit at Munkustrap’s grave. But being a tom who could not sit still for long, he would soon grow restless and get up to pace the yard. Back and forth he’d scurry, muttering to himself. Nobody could make it out. The kittens would watch curiously, and some would follow him, hopping along behind him until he got sick of that and, with a fluff of his mane, strutted off elsewhere. For the rest of the day, he would spend his time sitting, sometimes napping, but mostly just sitting, his mind engaged in a rapt contemplation. Most could guess what he was thinking of. His brother, most likely. And word had spread throughout the junkyard that Tugger would be taking on the responsibilities of the Jellicle leader. What this meant for the tribe’s future, nobody knew.

Some of the older cats were concerned. They liked Tugger well enough. Hell, they considered him family. But it was not a secret that Tugger was impulsive, indecisive, and fickle. Being a leader meant making important decisions and _sticking_ to them.

The opinions of the cats closer to Tugger’s age were mixed. Some had faith in him. Some felt like other cats who were _not_ descendants of Old Deuteronomy, like Mistoffelees or Quaxo or Alonzo, would make better leaders. And some, such as Bombalurina, were _dying_ to be his queen.

The kittens, who did not know much about how politics worked or how the death of a loved one affected a cat, were excited for Tugger. They would bombard him with questions like, ‘ _Are you excited?_ ’ and ‘ _Do we call you Old Tugger now? Or King Tugger!_ ’ and ‘ _Are you going to defeat Macavity?_ ’ That one hurt. _A lot_. But Tugger knew they didn’t understand. So he answered their questions, albeit unenthusiastically.

Over the next week, the Jellicles had noticed differences in Tugger. He seemed to have lost his spark. This was to be expected, of course, as he had lost his brother _and_ his father, both in the same night. But it was unnerving, to say the least. Upon hearing the screams of fangirling kittens as he entered the junkyard, he didn’t bask in the attention. Instead, he simply gave each of them a quick ‘ _hello_ ’ and went on his way. The only kitten who seemed to be able to make him smile was his niece, Jemima.

“So,” Jemima conversed, swinging her legs off the top of a tall shelf she sat on with Tugger by her side, “Are you gonna get really fluffy like Old Deuteronomy?”

“I think I have enough fluff as it is,” Tugger replied flatly.

“Oh.” Jemima rested her chin in her hands. “Well… I bet the balls will be fun, with you as the leader!”

“The balls are already fun.”

“Um, well… You can add your own Tugger _flare_ to them!” Then she gasped, “Maybe you can play _The Rumpus Cat_ next year!”

“Maybe.” Tugger shrugged.

“And the next time Macavity comes around, you can beat him up!”

Tugger turned to look down at Jemima in shock when she mentioned Macavity.

“And you- Oop.” Jemima covered her mouth with her paws.

Tugger sighed. “It’s getting late. How about we get you home? Your mom doesn’t want you out after dark.”

“Aw, come on, uncle Tugger!”

“No,” he said firmly, “Absolutely not.” And with that, he picked the scruff of her neck up in his mouth and hopped off the shelf, carrying her back to her and Demeter’s den.

***

On an evening very similar to that one, Tugger, then a kitten, sat with his big brother, Munkustrap. Munkustrap was just an adolescent at the time and had just learned that _he_ was to be the heir to his father’s throne when his time inevitably came.

“I bet you’ll be a _really_ good leader, Munk,” Tugger exclaimed, batting at Munkustrap’s tail.

“I guess…” Munkustrap shrugged, staring at the rising moon.

“Maybe we can call you ‘ _Old Possum_ ’!” Tugger added excitedly.

Munkustrap looked down at his brother quizzically. “Why Possum? Why not… ‘ _Old Munkustrap_ ’? Or better yet, just Munkustrap.”

“Be _cauuuuse!_ You’re grey, like a possum!”

Munkustrap snorted, “You think I look like a possum?”

“Hey, you said it, not me,” Tugger snickered. There was a moment of silence and then Tugger asked another question. “Munk?”

“Yeah Tugs?”

“Are we always gonna be together?”

“... Yeah.”

“Promise?” Tugger looked up at his brother with big, innocent eyes.

“Yeah, Tugs. I promise. As long as the sun and moon shall endure.”

“As long as the sun and moon… _What?_ ”

“It’s an oath of everlasting friendship. I read it in a book once.” Munkustrap smiled.

“Well, then. As long as the moon and… And the sun shall… En… Enjure?”

“Exactly! You got it!” He held his paw out for a high five, which Tugger promptly slapped. “Alright, it’s getting late. Dad wants us home before the moon is highest in the sky.”

“Awww, come _on_ , can’t we stay out a _little_ longer?” Tugger whined.

“No,” Munkustrap said firmly, “Absolutely not. It’s almost past your bedtime and I don’t need dad on my case about you falling asleep during hunting lessons tomorrow. You know what they say. Early to bed, early to rise makes a tom healthy, wealthy and wise!”

“Does it make me _cool?_ ” Tugger asked, “I don’t care about all that _other_ stuff.”

“Sure, Tugs. It makes ya cool. Now, let’s get you to bed.” Munkustrap gathered Tugger up into his arms and made his way to their den.

Once Munkustrap had Tugger all tucked in, he sat by the nest and began to sing him a lullaby. One their mother had sung to Munkustrap when he was Tugger’s age.

“ _You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,_

 _You make me happy when skies are grey._ ”

“ _You’ll never know, Tugs, how much I love you,_

 _So please don’t take my sunshine away…_ ”

As Munkustrap sang the last lines of the song, Tugger’s eyelids drooped, eventually falling shut. Once Munkustrap was sure he wouldn’t wake up, he himself crawled into the nest next to his little brother, gently moving the blanket aside to slip underneath it.

That night, the two brothers had made a promise to each other. And they would keep it for as long as the sun and moon would endure. But upon Munkustrap’s death, it felt as if Tugger’s moon had been taken away… Leaving only the sun.


	7. Chapter 7

“Thank you for keeping an eye on Jemima tonight,” Demeter sighed, lounging on her makeshift pillow couch, “It’s just been… So hard… I… I’ve been trying to stay strong for her, not let her see me cry… But when night falls and she goes to sleep I just… I just feel so lonely.” A tear fell from her eye. Then another, then another. Soon, she had her face in her paws, trying to keep herself together. “I’m- I’m s-sorry I-”

“It’s okay…” Tugger soothed, wrapping his tail around her. He wasn’t usually one for physical affection, but right now, his friend needed him.

“This might sound presumptuous of me but… Would you like me to stay here with you?” Tugger offered, “It might be good, having someone here in the evenings, to keep you out of your own head. I know how it feels to drown in your thoughts. I’d offer to let you move to mine but… It’s not very big. Not that it’d be a problem, you being there! And I don’t mean to intrude.”

Demeter thought for a moment. Tugger had a point. When Jemima went to bed, all Demeter  _ had  _ was her thoughts… And they felt like being stuck in quicksand. The more you try to get out, the deeper you sink. She nodded. “I’d like that. I’ll have to clear a place for you to nest, but that shouldn’t take long.”

Unbeknownst to the two cats, Jemima had been awake and listening. She had felt sad, hearing her mother cry, but her spirits were lifted upon hearing Tugger’s suggestion. She sprung out of bed and tore into the living area. “Uncle Tugger’s sleeping over!?”

Demeter opened her mouth to tell Jemima to go to bed, but instead, she just smiled. “Yes! He’s going to be here for a little while, just until we can get back to normal.”

“Yaaay!” Jemima jumped up and down, “Yay yay yay yay yay!”  
  
“Okay, little jumping bean, calm down. Let’s get you tucked in again,” Demeter chuckled.

“Can uncle Tugger tuck me in?” Jemima looked at Tugger hopefully.

Demeter gave him a pleading look.

“Well… I can’t say no to my  _ favourite niece _ , now can I?” Tugger smiled.

“I’m your only niece!” Jemima giggled.

“Ergo, my favourite, silly!” Tugger ruffled her fur, picking her up and carrying her to her nest. He tucked her in and nuzzled her forehead.

“Can you sing to me, uncle Tugger?” Jemima requested.

“Sure, kid. Got any requests?”

“You are my sunshine!”

Now  _ that _ took Tugger back. He hadn’t heard that song since he was a  _ kitten _ . He had no idea Munkustrap went on to sing it to  _ Jemima _ . It was a nice thought. His brother always  _ was _ one for tradition. “Alright. Let’s see here…”

“ _ The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping, _

_ I dreamed I held you in my arms, _ ”

“Papa puts my name in the song,” Jemima interrupted with a pout.

“Alright, alright. Let’s try again, then.” Tugger playfully rolled his eyes.

“ _ The other night… Jem… As I lay sleeping, _

_ I dreamed I held you in my arms. _ ”

“ _ When I awoke, Jem, I was mistaken, _ ”

_ So I hung my head and I cried, _ ”

“That’s not how the song goes! That’s too sad!” Jemima complained, “It’s a happy song!”

Tugger knew it wasn’t. It was a song about lost love. But he humoured her. “Hm… Why don’t you sing it to me? Remind me how it goes, and I can sing it right tomorrow night.”

Jemima got a giddy little grin on her face and began to sing.

“ _ You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, _

_ You make me happy when skies are grey. _ ”

“ _ You’ll never know, Tugs, how much I love you, _

_ So please don’t take my sunshine away… _ ”

When Jemima finished singing, Tugger pretended to be asleep, letting out a loud snore.

“ _ Tuggerrrr! _ You’re so silly!” Jemima giggled.

Tugger opened his eyes wide. “Jemima, you woke me up!”

“No, I didn’t, you were pretending!” Jemima slapped him on the shoulder playfully.

“I don’t know… Your pa always had the ability to lull me to sleep just with his voice. You might have that kind of magic  _ too _ .”

Jemima gasped. “I have magic!?”  
  
“You _are_ his daughter, after all. But you’ll have to keep practicing. Promise?” Tugger held out his pinky.

Jemima linked her pinky with his. “As long as the sun and moon endure.”  
  
Tugger paused. “Where did you hear that?” he asked.

“My papa read it to me from a book once! He liked to read me bedtime stories.” Jemima explained.

“Oh? What’s your favourite? Maybe I know it.”

As Demeter watched Tugger talk to Jemima, she felt a tear roll down her cheek and soak into her fur. Whether it was from sadness, or because of the heartfelt moment before her, she couldn’t tell. She wished that this would all go away, that it would just be another horrible dream. If she could just wake up from this nightmare, she’d feel Munkustrap’s body next to her. She would sit up crying and he’d ask her what was wrong. She’d tell him about her dream, and he would hold her, assuring her that everything was alright. That it would be okay. But she knew, deep down, that this was real. Munkustrap would never hold her again. She’d never feel his body curled up next to her. She’d never be able to hear him tell her that everything’s alright. Because everything was just…  _ Wrong _ .

***

“ _ In all my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me, _

_ When I awake my poor heart pains. _ ”

“ _ So when you come back and make me happy, _

_ I'll forgive you, dear, I'll take all the blame. _ ”


	8. Chapter 8

The next day was the day. Tugger would be made the next Jellicle leader. There he stood, on the big tire, before the whole tribe. He had been given two weeks to grieve. Two weeks wasn’t enough. Everlasting, it wasn’t enough! But the tribe  _ needed  _ guidance, especially during a time like this. He just had to remind himself, ‘ _ It’s what Munk would do. It’s what dad would do… _ ’ Suddenly, he felt a paw on his shoulder and he jumped. Turning, he saw it was only Alonzo.

“Tugger? Are you  _ sure  _ you’re ready for this?” Alonzo asked, “I mean… I know we’re  _ all  _ grieving, but… I can’t  _ imagine  _ how you must feel.”

Tugger held his chin high. “I have to. I’m as ready as I’ll  _ ever _ be. There’s no point delaying it. No point in running from it…”

“... As long as this is what you want…” Alonzo said hesitantly.

Tugger paused for a moment. How to respond to that… “Well, let’s get on with it, then.”

Alonzo sighed, then faced the tribe with Tugger. “As Munkustrap’s second in command, I am… Most equipped to handle matters such as these. Today, on behalf of our dear departed friends, I will be passing the responsibility of leadership onto their next of kin.” He turned to Tugger. “Rum Tum Tugger. Do you swear by the Heaviside Layer and the Everlasting Cat to lead the tribe with kindness, dignity, and grace?”

“I swear,” Tugger replied.

“Do you promise to be faithful and true to others who do as Jellicles do?”

“I promise.”

“Then please take a knee,” Alonzo instructed.

Tugger knelt before Alonzo and bowed his head.

“Rum Tum Tugger. By the power vested in me by the Everlasting Cat, I hereby pronounce that you are the leader of the Jellicle tribe. They will look to you, in good times and bad. Treat them with the same care and leadership that your ancestors did before you.”

Normally, this would be met with cheers. But it felt disrespectful to treat this like a happy occasion.  _ Nobody  _ wanted this. So the Jellicles gave small, polite applause and then dispersed.

“Tugger?” Alonzo put a hand on his shoulder. “You don’t look well. Let’s get you home.”

Tugger stayed on one knee, just staring at the ground.

“Tugger?”

A teardrop hit the dirt and soaked in, making a dark circle where it landed. A few more did the same until Tugger was sobbing. He fell to his hands and knees, just letting the tears flow. It was the first time he’d had a good cry since the night Munkustrap and Old Deuteronomy had passed. In between then and now, he had just been numb. Now that he was the Jellicle leader, it became so much more  _ real  _ to him. They were gone. He’d never hear his father laugh, or Munkustrap’s sigh of annoyance at his antics with Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer. Demeter would never feel Munkustrap’s paw in hers. Old Deuteronomy would never get to meet his next grandchild. Munkustrap wouldn’t get to watch Jemima grow up.

“Tugger…” It was a softer voice this time. Demeter. She took him by his paws and pulled him to his feet. He leaned on her and she held him up, hugging him tightly. “Let’s get you back to the den…”

Tugger nodded numbly. He let Demeter lead him back to her and Jemima’s den and sit him on the couch.

“You stay right there. I’m… Going to make us some tea…” Demeter made her way to her little makeshift kitchen, checking in on Jemima on the way. In a few minutes, she came back with two tin cans filled with peppermint tea and sat down next to Tugger. “So… I suppose this is bringing up some new emotions… Are you scared?”

“Terrified. But I can’t let that keep me down. I just have to keep going.”

“Tugger… It’s okay if you don’t want to do this,” Demeter assured him.

He shook his head. “It’s what my dad would have wanted.”

“Your father would have wanted you to be  _ happy _ , Tugger,” she sighed.

Tugger didn’t respond. He only sipped his tea before changing the subject. “How’s Jemima doing?”

“I…” Demeter wanted to keep talking about Tugger’s decision, but she just sighed. “She’s been doing okay. She doesn’t quite understand death. But she knows her father is gone. She’s been awfully cheerful recently, though. I hope it’s not to mask the pain…”

“She’s a lot like her dad.” Tugger crossed his legs. “Munkustrap would hide a lot of his pain from the ones he cared about. I remember seeing him stressed a lot when dad started prepping him to become the next Jellicle leader. He’d never tell him how much it affected him because he was scared dad would be disappointed in him. But gosh… Nothing Munk could do could  _ ever _ disappoint dad. I wish he had known that. But anyway. If Jemima’s anything like him, it might be good to check up on her.” This was nice. Little conversations like this distracted him from the pain, the sinking feeling in his chest, the dryness of his mouth and the tears that threatened to spill at the slightest provocation.

“I just don’t want to upset her. She’s so sensitive, I- Oh…” Demeter got an odd look on her face.

“Demeter?” Tugger raised an eyebrow. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, I just… Just a minute.” And with that, she ran out of the den.

Tugger sat for a minute, waiting for her until he decided he should go check on her. He went around the side of the den to find her gagging and retching. She had gotten sick. He averted his eyes, partly out of respect and partly out of not wanting to see what she had hacked up. Still looking away, he knelt down and put a hand on her shoulder. “Demeter? Are you alright?”

Demeter sat back on her haunches and leaned into Tugger. “I’m sorry…” Her voice was shaky. She was crying!

“Hey! Hey… It’s alright…” he soothed, “It’s cold, let’s take you inside.” He helped her stand and led her back into the den. He sat her on the couch and got her a handkerchief to wipe her mouth.

“I-I’m sorry… I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve been getting sick every night since the ball…”

“Do you think you ate some bad mouse?” he asked.

She shook her head. “I’ve been having a hard time keeping any food down. But I’ve been trying. Certain foods I used to love just make me feel sick now.”

“Wait.” Tugger counted silently on his fingers. His eyes widened, then he shuddered at the thought that popped into his head. “Okay, I don’t like  _ that  _ mental image.”

“What?” Demeter tilted her head.

“Sorry. Just thinking out loud. Stay here and… Uh… Here.” He grabbed a pillow and a blanket, the one Jenny had made for Demeter as a gift when she had Jemima. He placed the pillow under Demeter’s head and covered her with the blanket. “Rest.” Then he turned and rushed out the door.

  
“Wait! Where are you-” But he was gone. Demeter sighed. “Oh, well.” She laid down and shut her eyes, hoping to get  _ some  _ sleep in the time Tugger was gone.


	9. Chapter 9

Tugger ran as fast as he could across the junkyard.  _ This  _ was what he needed. A mission. Something to distract him from the pain he felt. He finally made it to the den of Jennyanydots. He knocked on the outside of the structure. “Jenny!” he called, “Are you in there?”

After a moment, a  _ very  _ sleepy-looking Jenny came to the entrance to the den. She looked ready to rip Tugger a new one for waking her up, but when she saw the look of concern on his face, her expression softened. “Tugger? Whatever’s the matter, dear?”

“I think Demeter might be pregnant.”  
  
“Oh, dear! Okay. Go back to her, I’ll be over in just a moment,” Jenny instructed, “I have to take Electra over to Skimble and Jelly’s den.”

Tugger nodded and headed back to the den. When he arrived, Demeter had fallen asleep.

Demeter opened her eyes and sat up. “Tugger? What’s going on?” she asked.

“I just went to get Jenny. Demeter… It sounds like you’re… Pregnant.”

“Pregnant! What? No!”

“On the night of the ball, or before, did you…  _ You know _ ?” Tugger didn’t want to think of his brother like that. He figured avoiding the word would make it easier to talk about.

“We… We did… But no! It’s… It’s too soon! I can’t be! Not this soon after…” Demeter let out a sob.

Tugger was quick to pull her into a hug. “Just try to relax. Jenny will be over soon. She can confirm whether or not it’s true.”

Demeter nodded. She was conflicted. She had wanted to have more kittens with Munkustrap. She loved the idea of a big family. But finding out so soon after his death was too much for her to bear.

Soon, Jenny came into the den, followed by Tantomile. “Alright,” Jenny took off her coat and scarf, “Let’s take a look at you, Demeter.”

“Tantomile? How can you help?” Tugger asked. It was the first time he’d seen her separated from her brother. It was weird, the two of them not being basically joined at the hip.

“Tantomile is very connected to the energy of the world around her. Very specifically feminine energy,” Jenny explained, “If there are kittens, she’ll be able to feel them.” She approached Demeter and felt her forehead. Jenny was always very touchy. She often forgot to ask if it was alright. “How have you been feeling? Have you been eating enough? Feeling sick?”

“I’ve been trying to keep food down. But the things I would usually eat make me feel unwell. I’ve only been able to keep down scraps that Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer have been generous enough to share with me from their escapades to the city. Things like sausage, meat pies, and the like.”

“Hm.” Jenny tapped her chin thoughtfully. “Well, I’m glad you’ve been eating.  _ If _ there are kittens, they’ll need all the nutrients they can get. Now. Tantomile?”

“Is it okay if I touch you?” Tantomile asked, her paw hovering over Demeter’s belly.

Demeter nodded. “Go ahead.”

Tantomile rested her paws on Demeter’s stomach and closed her eyes. After a moment, her ears twitched and she opened her eyes. There were kittens alright. But not only could she feel the kittens… She could feel all of Demeter’s fear and sadness. All of the emotions she had been feeling ever since Munkustrap had passed. It was too much. She couldn’t take it. She removed her paws from Demeter and covered her face, beginning to sob.

“Tantomile? Tanto, what is it? What’s wrong? Am I pregnant? Are they okay? Oh  _ god _ are they… Tantomile please tell me they’re okay!” Demeter hadn’t expected this. Why would Tantomile be crying unless there was something horribly wrong with her or her kittens?

Through her tears, Tantomile nodded. Once she had composed herself, she looked back to Demeter. “Demeter… You are pregnant. You have been since the night of the ball.”

Demeter swallowed hard. Of course. She should have expected this, but she thought maybe her symptoms would be a coincidence. “Are they healthy?”

“Yes.” Tantomile smiled. “All three of them are doing fine.”

Demeter breathed a sigh of relief. “Three… Wow… Can you tell their genders?”

“I’m afraid not. I can only feel how many there are. I can’t tell something as complex as gender. But if you want, I can check in on them as they grow, to ensure that they stay healthy,” Tantomile offered.

“I’d like that. Thank you.” Demeter smiled.

***

Once Tantomile and Jenny had left, Tugger sat next to Demeter on the couch.

“I’m so scared, Tugger. I’ve never raised kittens by myself before.” Demeter leaned into his mane. He wasn’t Munkustrap. But he was a comfort to her.

“I know. But…” Tugger hesitated. “You don’t have to do it alone. I-I know how that sounds! I’m not suggesting we get together. Just… I’m their uncle, and I want to help you. I could stay for as long as you want me to. I’d be happy to.”

“If you don’t mind,” Demeter sniffled, “I’d really appreciate the help.”

“Of course! Now, come on. It’s late, and I think we’ve all had a long day.”

She nodded and got up to head to her nest.

Tugger watched her go and then sat down on the couch. When he was sure she was asleep, he began to cry.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Just so you know, this story is henceforth going to be called "The sun and the Moon"

The first time Demeter suspected she was pregnant, she had only been a Jellicle for a month. It wasn’t long after she had escaped from Macavity and taken shelter with the tribe. She knew for a  _ fact  _ that the kitten was Macavity’s. What would everyone  _ think? _ Would they think she really  _ was _ a spy, reporting back to him in the night? She decided to go to the only cat she knew who could guarantee her secrecy. Her good friend, Munkustrap. The two had grown very close over the past month, both having been hurt by Macavity in some way or another. There was also Tugger, of course. But he bore too much of a resemblance to Macavity, and he reminded her of how Macavity was before darkness overtook him. He was just too much of a reminder of her old life.

Upon arriving at Munkustrap’s den, she saw him there, sunning himself on a lone tire.

“Hello, Munkustrap,” she greeted nervously.

Munkustrap opened one eye. When he saw who had come to visit him, he grinned, sitting up. “Demeter!” He got up and sauntered over to her. “How are you today?”

“Not… Not well… I… I have to talk to you about something… But I need it to stay between you and me until I can… Figure things out.” Demeter gave him a pleading look.

“Oh? Well, come on inside and we’ll talk.” He put an arm around her shoulders and led her into his den. He made his home inside a large car that had been insulated by the trash piled up around it. It was warm inside. Her den, not so much.

Demeter lived inside a large piece of metal tubing. It provided shelter from the elements, but it got awfully cold. Luckily, she had found some fluffy pillows and blankets to curl up underneath. Munkustrap had offered to let her stay with him, but she refused, not wanting to impose on him. But now, if she really  _ was _ pregnant… She worried about her kittens.

Munkustrap sat her down on a cushion he had set up for her in his living area and then went to sit on his own. “What’s troubling you?” he asked.

“I… I think I might… Be pregnant…” she admitted.

“Oh.  _ Oh! _ And… It’s Macavity’s?” he inquired carefully.

She nodded. “It’s the only logical explanation. I’m so scared, Munkustrap. What will everyone think? I know not everyone fully trusts me yet… And I’m sure having  _ his  _ child won’t help that.”

“Hey, wait. One thing at a time. We don’t even know if you  _ are _ pregnant. I mean…  _ Do  _ you? I know a queen’s intuition can be quite accurate but I… I have to admit, I’m not well-versed in matters such as this,” he chuckled, scratching behind his ear.

“I think… But… How can we know for sure?” Demeter asked.

“There is one way, but it involves confiding in two more cats. One of which is a dear friend of mine. I can assure you, she won’t pass judgement, and she won’t tell a soul. Nothing bad will happen to you. Do you trust me?”

Demeter thought for a moment. If it really was the only way… “I do.”

The two cats headed over to the den of Jennyanydots. Munkustrap tapped on the outside of the den and waited. Soon, Jenny came out and greeted him with a hug. “Munkustrap, dear! And Demeter! What brings the two of you here?”

“We’ve come to speak with you about something important. May we come in?” Munkustrap asked.

“Of course!” Jenny stepped aside to let them inside and then followed them to the sitting area. “Make yourselves comfy wherever you’d like, I know it’s a  _ dreadful _ mess in here! I’ve been knitting a lot recently and haven’t gotten around to tidying up my yarn.”

“No worries, Jenny.” Munkustrap smiled. “Now. Demeter? Do you want to tell her or shall I?”

“I… Well, see, I think I might be pregnant.”

“And we thought you should know. I know you like to look after the expecting queens, and I figured that if it’s true, you’d be the best-suited queen for the job,” Munkustrap explained.

“Oh! Oh my! Well, then! I’ll get Tantomile at once! Just stay here for a moment!” And with that, Jenny was out the door.

Demeter nervously fidgeted and messed with her tail. “I’m still… Really scared. What if they think the kittens will be like  _ him?  _ I don’t want them to grow up with their father’s legacy looming over them.”

“Really, Demeter. The Jellicles aren’t like that. These hypothetical kittens are the most innocent party here. The tribe would never hold their father’s legacy against them. Or you, for that matter,” Munkustrap affirmed.

“I…” Demeter sighed. She couldn’t bring herself to fully let her guard down.

Before Demeter could say anything more, Jenny returned with Tantomile in tow. “Now! Let’s get down to business, hm? Demeter, dear, can you come sit here?” Jenny patted a cushion that was set next to Tantomile.

Demeter got up and did as instructed. “Hi…” she said shyly. She hadn’t spoken to Tantomile before. She’d seen her around with her brother, though. The pair were a very quiet couple of cats. But she never got any bad vibes off of them.

“Hello.” Tantomile gave her a bright smile. “It’s good to meet you. My name is Tantomile.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you as well.” Demeter nodded to her.

“Is it okay if I touch your stomach?” Tantomile asked.  
  
“Yes, yes, go ahead.”

Tantomile laid a paw on Demeter’s abdomen and closed her eyes. Yes, indeed, she could feel one little kitten in there. But there was something odd about it. Some energy it was giving off that she couldn’t quite place. She opened her eyes and smiled. “You’ve got one little kitten!”

“Oh! How wonderful!” Jenny squealed, “We’ll have another new addition to the tribe! I’m sure you two are very happy! It’s always an exciting experience, building a family.” She looked at Demeter and Munkustrap expectantly.

The pair gave each other a look. Did Jenny think that  _ Munkustrap _ was the father?

“Munkustrap, I know you’ll be a _wonderful_ father,” Jenny continued, “I just knew you two were a _perfect_ match from the day you met!”

Munkustrap didn’t waste a second for Demeter to correct her. “Yes! It’s very exciting! But a little scary,” he lied.

“That’s normal, dear.” Jenny smiled comfortingly. “But you two have each other. I’m sure you’ll do just fine. And I’ll always be here to help.”

“Thank you, Jenny. And thank you for your help tonight. I’m feeling a little tired, so I think we should head home.” Demeter got up from her seat and headed for the door.

“Have a good night, dear!” Jenny called after the two.

Once Munkustrap and Demeter got outside, they had a silent walk back to Munkustrap’s den. “So,” Demeter said once they arrived, “Excited to be a father, are you?” She gave him a little playful punch to the shoulder.

“I… I’m sorry. I should have asked you first. But she assumed the kitten is mine and I figured that if it would make you feel better… What the tribe doesn’t know won’t hurt them? I don’t expect us to be mates. Not if you don’t want to. I mean, we’ve known each other for, what? A month? But I’m your friend, and I’m more than happy to help you raise this kitten. My den is always open.”

“You’d really be this kitten’s father? For me?”

“Of course. I’d do anything for you, Demeter.” Munkustrap nuzzled under Demeter’s chin.

***

  
Munkustrap said he’d do anything for her. Looking back, Demeter realized that he had really meant it. But she never, in a million years, expected that he would have to  _ die  _ for her…


	11. Chapter 11

It was a sunny but chilly afternoon in the junkyard, and Tugger was watching Jemima in the sleeping area of Demeter’s den while Demeter had a visit with her sister, Bombalurina, in the sitting area. Tugger found that one of the few things that took his mind off his grief was Jemima. She was such a sweet little kitten, and she always tried to cheer him up. Ever since Munkustrap’s death, Tugger had lost his boisterous and showy persona, and Jemima seemed to pick up on this fact.

“Can you sing me a song, Tugger?” Jemima asked, playing around with her stuffed kitty.

“Sure.” Tugger gave her a gentle smile and began to sing a soft lullaby. Another one that Munkustrap would sing to him when he was a kitten. He didn’t know what it was called, but Munkustrap told him it was written by some beetles. He figured Jenny had taught her cockroaches to write music.

“ _ Once there was a way _

_ to get back homeward _

_ Once there was a way _

_ to get back home _ ”

“ _ Sleep, pretty darling _

_ do not cry _

_ And I will sing a lullaby... _ ”

“ _ No! _ ” Jemima laughed, “Not a  _ lullaby! _ One of the songs you’d sing at the ball!” She smiled expectantly.

Tugger looked at her for a moment before giving a tired sigh. He didn’t want to disappoint her. But he just didn’t have the energy. He picked Jemima up and set her on his lap. “I don’t think I can.”

“Why not?” Jemima asked, “Papa would want you to keep singing!”

“He would, would he?” Tugger raised an eyebrow, slightly amused at the idea of his  _ brother _ enjoying one of his performances.

“Uh-huh!” Jemima nodded. “Papa told me he’s going to miss your singing a lot!”

“... He… Told you that.” Tugger gave her an incredulous look. Munkustrap hadn’t spoken to Jemima in his dying moments. In fact, he hadn’t spoken to anyone. Because he was alone. He laid there in the cold darkness of the junkyard while the rest of the tribe fought off Macavity, unaware of what was happening to their protector just meters away. If someone had noticed… If someone had seen… If someone had realized what was happening in time… If  _ Tugger  _ had noticed in time, or better yet, been there to protect him… Munkustrap might still be alive. They’d have gotten him to safety and stopped the bleeding from his wound, and he’d be sitting here with Tugger and Jemima. He’d get to meet his kittens. Demeter wouldn’t be in so much pain. If only Tugger hadn’t run and hid while Macavity killed his brother. It was his fault. It was  _ all his fault _ . 

“Yeah! I hear him sometimes! Mostly when I’m sleeping. But sometimes when it’s  _ real  _ quiet, or I focus  _ real  _ hard, I can hear him laugh, or talk to me,” Jemima explained.

“Oh?” Tugger assumed this was all an imaginary game Jemima made to help her cope. “What does your papa tell you?”

“That he can’t wait to meet me again when he’s reborn.” Jemima smiled sweetly.


	12. Chapter 12

“Do you have any name ideas?” Bombalurina asked as she and Demeter sat in Demeter’s sitting area. She was trying to take Demeter’s mind off Munkustrap.

Demeter nodded. “I’ve been considering, for a boy, naming one of them after Munkustrap.”

Bombalurina smiled. “I think that’s a lovely idea. He’d be so happy if he could hear you say that. Maybe he’ll be reborn as one of your kittens.”

“I don’t know… Are we really sure cats who die without being chosen  _ go  _ to the Heaviside Layer?” Demeter asked.

“I believe so. It’s hard to know for sure, but I’d like to think so. Poor Gus, he deserves it as well,” Bomba sighed. The tribe was so busy mourning the loss of their leader and his son that most of them hadn’t given much thought to Gus, who had passed away peacefully in his den the night of the very same ball that Macavity had attacked. Jellylorum had been so distraught, as had Asparagus Jr. They had been there to comfort each other, but Bombalurina felt bad that Gus wasn’t given the attention he deserved.

“I hope so… Jemima keeps going on about the Heaviside Layer. She’s been asking all these questions. ‘What’s it like?’ and ‘When will papa be reborn?’ I can’t answer any of them. I wish I could… I’m scared that her way of grieving is trying to understand what’s been happening, and I can’t help her. I feel like a horrible mother.”

“Demeter, you’re an amazing mother.” Bombalurina took her sister’s paws in hers. “It’s okay to admit that you don’t know something. If anything, it might make Jemima feel less alone in her confusion.”

Demeter nodded. “You’re right. I’ll have a talk with her this evening. Thank you so much for this, Bomba. It’s nice to have someone to talk to.”

“Hey.” Bomba nuzzled Demeter. “We’re family. I’ll always be here for you. How is Tugger handling all this?”

“He seems to be holding it together alright. But I know it’s killing him inside. He’s lost his spark. I don’t expect him to be his usual  _ Tugger self _ , but it’s just odd seeing him so calm. He’s been very helpful with Jemima, though. She’s the one cat who seems to be able to make him smile, genuinely. But even behind that… I see so much hurt. And he looks so tired. I worry about when the tribe needs leadership. I know that he wants to do right by his family by taking up the mantle, but he doesn’t have to put so much stress on himself. He hardly gave himself time to grieve before stepping up as leader…”

“Demeter?” a voice interrupted.

The two queens looked to see Tugger standing in the doorway. Oh Everlasting, had he heard her?

“... Y-yes?” Demeter said nervously.

“There’s something I need to talk to you about.” Tugger looked to Bombalurina with a stern look. “Alone.”

“Right. Got it.” Bombalurina got up and quickly left.

Tugger took a seat with Demeter where Bomalurina had been sitting previously. “Jemima just told me that she’s been hearing… Voices. Specifically… Munk’s voice.”

“Wait. What? Jemima, sweetie, can you come in here please?” Demeter called.

Jemima scurried in, giving her mother a curious look.

“Uncle Tugger tells me you’ve been hearing voices.” Demeter tilted her head.

“Uh-huh!” Jemima nodded. “Papa’s voice,” she said, a little bit apprehensively.

“Oh? What does Papa say to you?” Demeter asked.

“That he misses me and you, and that he’s in the Heaviside Layer!” Jemima replied, grinning.

“That… Sounds very nice. Jemima, honey? Can you go play again? Uncle Tugger and I need to talk alone.”

“Okay Mommy!” she scurried off back to the bedroom.

Demeter turned to Tugger. “She’s playing a game. To cope with the loss.” She said it so certainly, but she wasn’t certain.

“Are you sure? What if it really is Munk? What if somehow, Munkustrap is communicating with her? I mean… She  _ does  _ seem a little  _ magical _ ,” Tugger suggested.

Demeter clapped a hand over Tugger’s mouth. “Don’t say that!  _ Macavity  _ is magic. And if  _ Jemima  _ is magic then that means she inherited his powers.”

Tugger took Demeter’s paw and removed it slowly from his mouth. “Are you…  _ Ashamed  _ of Jemima’s possible abilities?”

“No!  _ Never!  _ I’m  _ so _ proud of Jemima!” Demeter looked almost offended. She sighed. “Okay. The truth is…” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “I’m afraid that if Jemima is magical… That Macavity will try to take her from me. In the time that I was with him, he always had this idea of an heir. To take over his crime empire when he dies. Carry on his  _ legacy _ . He wanted kittens. But not to love them, and care for them. He wanted to further his bloodline. Further his  _ power _ . If he ever caught wind of a magical kitten… One  _ related  _ to him… He’d stop at nothing to… To…” Demeter couldn’t finish the thought. Her head fell into her paws and she began to sob.

Tugger put his arms around her. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. Look, I can’t lie, It’s…  _ A possibility  _ that Jemima has magic. But if she does, we’ll figure it out, yeah? Misto and the twins can try and help her control it, so it might not get out. But you have to promise me something, okay?”

“What?” Demeter looked up at him.

“You can’t make her afraid of them,” Tugger said sternly, “The  _ worst  _ thing you could do is have her repress them. Trust me. Misto’s got some stories of cats who’ve lost control because they tried to push it down.”

Demeter nodded. “Okay. I promise. I’m just so scared for her.”

“I am too. But hey, we’ve got each other. We’re pals, remember?” Tugger held out his paw for a fist bump.

Demeter just wrapped her paw around his and squeezed it. “Thank you, Tugger.”

“Man, you never  _ were _ one for fist bumps, were you?” Tugger laughed.

Demeter tittered in response, laying her head in his mane.


	13. Chapter 13

The next day, Tugger and Demeter took Jemima to the den of Mistoffelees. Mistoffelees was an odd cat who Demeter hadn’t spoken to very often. He was much less outgoing than Quaxo, his twin brother. Before Munkustrap’s untimely death, he had been training Quaxo to become the next storyteller when Munkustrap would eventually take up the role of Jellicle leader!

But Mistoffelees was different from his brother. He was very quiet and reserved. Sometimes you’d think him rude because he would ignore you when you spoke to him. But Tugger had explained to everyone that Mistoffelees had sensory issues and would use his magic to block out the sounds around him when things got too overwhelming. He was very polite and if he ever ignored you, it certainly wasn’t on purpose.

Demeter wasn’t quite sure what relationship Tugger had with Mistoffelees. She occasionally saw the two together, just chatting, or Tugger would be assisting him with a trick. Jemima quite liked it when Mistoffelees would put on shows and refer to Tugger as his “lovely assistant”. But ever since the ball, Tugger would be seen with Mistoffelees less and less as Tugger threw himself into his duties as the leader. He was oddly good at it, too. Very dedicated. It was almost as if he were trying to  _ be Munkustrap.  _ And that was a little bit unsettling. Tugger hardly ever gave himself time to relax. Only with Demeter or Jemima would he truly be himself.

“Mommy?” Jemima tugged on Demeter’s tail as they approached Mistoffelees’ den, pulling Demeter out of her thoughts.

Demeter glanced down at Jemima. “Yes?”

“What’re we doin’ here?” Jemima asked.

“We’re… Well…” Demeter knelt down. “Jemmy, Tugger and I think you might… Well, we think you might be magic.”

“ _ Magic? _ Like the princesses in the storybooks daddy read me?”

“A little! We’re going to see if Mistoffelees can tell us for sure, and if he can help you,” Tugger interjected.

“Help me?” Jemima tilted her head.

“Yeah! Help you use them properly.” Demeter smiled. She took Jemima’s paw and led her to the door.

“Can I knock?” Jemima asked excitedly.

“Sure you can, sweetie,” Demeter chuckled.

Jemima began to rapidly drum on the door with both of her paws until it was answered.

Mistoffelees gave Tugger a death glare, assuming he had been the one to make the ruckus. “You know it’s unlocked, right?”

“Hey.” Tugger held his paws up defensively. “Wasn’t me!”

Mistoffelees looked down to Jemima and smiled, getting down on one knee to match her level. “Why, hello Jemima!”

“Uncle Misto!” Jemima squealed, hugging him. Misto had no relation to her, Tugger or anyone in the family, but he was such a close family friend that Jemima saw Misto as an uncle.

Misto picked Jemima up and stood back up. “What brings you three here?” he asked.

“We’ve got something very important to discuss with you,” Demeter said, “May we come in?”  
  
“‘Course!” Misto stepped aside and welcomed them inside. His den was dark, with black velvet (Courtesy of Mungojerrie) draped down the inside of the old car Misto made his home in. Lighting it were many little candles. But they were not lit with fire. Instead, each candle glowed with a dim violet light, obviously enchanted. Lining the walls were little shelves full of old books, knick-knacks and trinkets. Little bits and bobs that really held no use for humans, but Misto had managed to find ways to use them in his magic. Whether it was little tricks or enchantments. The items included bits of gemstones from broken jewelry that had been discarded by humans, simple items like copper wire and silver bells, and various herbs in little jars, such as agrimony, blue sage and catnip. Tugger had asked Misto many times for just a taste or a sniff of said catnip, but Misto told him every time, ‘ _It’s for my spells, not recreation_ ’. Misto sat down on a cushion in his sitting area. “Please,” he offered, gesturing to the other pillows, “Sit.”

Demeter and Tugger both took a seat and Jemima hopped out of Misto’s arms and back to her mother.

“So. What seems to be the problem?” Misto asked.

“How did you know there’s a problem?” Demeter asked.

“I can feel your energy, somewhat. Also, Tugger’s been wringing his paws and he only ever does that when something is stressing him out.”

Demeter, Jemima and Misto all looked to Tugger who was, indeed, wringing his paws.

“Jemima, can you tell uncle Misto who you’ve been talking to?” Demeter asked.

“Daddy!” Jemima grinned.

“She claims to be hearing Munkustrap’s voice,” Demeter explained, “I figured it was just a little game she was playing, to cope. But Tugger made me realize it could be possible she’s inherited some abilities from… Him, you know.”

Misto nodded. “I understand.”

No one knew when it would be appropriate or even  _ safe _ to tell Jemima about her relation to Macavity. None of them  _ ever _ wanted to call him her  _ father _ . Munkustrap had used the word ‘sire’ to describe his connection to Jemima. It was factual, and also showed that he had no entitlement to her. It was always Demeter’s worst fear that one day Macavity would come and try to take her from them, to raise her as his own. Jemima was so young, naive and trusting that it wouldn’t be hard to gain her favour. That silly little kitty always gave everyone a chance. She’d have to be warned about him eventually. But Demeter was  _ equally  _ afraid that if Jemima knew he was her biological father, that she would seek him out herself. And that was scarier than him  _ coming _ for her. Because there’d be nothing anyone could do to stop him.

“But what you’re describing sounds like  _ psychic _ abilities. I’ve no experience in that. I do, you know,” Misto held his hand out and summoned a glowing purple butterfly that fluttered down to Jemima and landed on her nose. “Tricks. Levitation, illusions, enchantments.”

Jemima giggled and batted at the butterfly with her paws and watched it break up into a hundred little glowing orbs when she hit it.

“I think you need to go see Coricopat and Tantomile about this.  _ They’ll  _ know what to do,” Misto suggested, “But please, come see me again if she displays abilities more like mine, and I’d be happy to help her learn.” He smiled.

“Thank you, Misto.” Tugger smiled. He and Demeter got up and headed for the door.

“Yes, we really appreciate this,” Demeter added.

“And Tugger?” Misto called after them.

Tugger turned to look at him.

“Don’t be a stranger.” Misto gave him a small smile.

Tugger nodded. “Thanks, buddy.” And with that, he left behind Demeter, softly shutting the door behind him.

And now it was time to consult the twins.


	14. Chapter 14

After their visit with Mistoffelees, Demeter, Tugger and Jemima headed back across the junkyard to visit the den that Tantomile and her twin, Coricopat, shared. The twins were a strange pair. When they first came to the junkyard, they came without warning or explanation. One day everyone woke up and they were just _there_ . They were playful and caused no harm, so they soon gained the tribe’s trust and began their new lives in the yard. Nobody knew where they came from before. Nobody asked though everyone wondered. But what was most intriguing were the mystical abilities the two possessed. They never said it themselves, but from what the tribe witnessed, most cats would describe it as psychic abilities. Some believed them to even have some connection to the Heaviside Layer or even the Everlasting Cat! But the twins were humble, and never made a show of their abilities. But sometimes, things would go missing, or something around the yard would feel _off_ , and most of the Jellicles _swore_ it was the twins using their powers to pull pranks.

As Demeter raised her paw to knock on the door, it opened before she could even make contact! It was Tantomile who greeted them there with a grin. “Hello! I’ve been expecting you!” she said excitedly, stepping aside, “Come in, come in!”

The three made their way inside and Tantomile shut the door behind them. Coricopat was busy with a deck of tarot cards and was intently focused.

“Cori,” Tantomile called, “They’re here, just as I foretold!”

Coricopat looked up from his cards and smiled. “Hello. How are you three?” There was an air of cautiousness in his voice, as he kept in mind that they were grieving.

“As well as can be expected, Coricopat!” Tugger said rather formally.

Demeter raised an eyebrow, and even Jemima gave him a funny look.

“We’re here because-” Demeter started.

“Oh!” Tantomile giggled, “I know why you’ve come!” She turned to Jemima and got down to her level. “So, you’ve been experiencing some strange things, haven’t you, Sillabub?”

“I’ve been hearing my papa’s voice!” Jemima grinned. “And in my dreams I see him.”

“Oh? What does your Papa say to you?” Tantomile asked.

“That he loves meeee, and he misses meeee, and he’s happy! Up in the Heaviside Layer!”

“Oh, isn’t that nice! Why don’t you go outside and tell Cori all about it while I talk to your mommy, okay?”

“Okay!” Jemima held Coricopat’s hand and took him outside the den.

Tantomile turned to Demeter.

“I think she’s telling the truth,” Demeter said, “Not long ago I had… A strange dream.”

“Oh? Tell me about it.” Tantomile gestured for the two to sit down on some cushions she had laid out.

Demeter sat down and began to recount the dream she had about Munkustrap. “I was in this beautiful meadow. And Munkustrap was there. Jemima was there as well, but she was off in the distance playing. We talked for a little, about her. And when I woke up, Jemima told me about a dream she had. It took place in a meadow, with us off in the distance, and she was playing. It sounded so eerily like the same dream but from her perspective. Almost as if we were both _there_. But that’s insane!”

“Not necessarily,” Tantomile corrected, “Dreams are funny. Sometimes things not from this world make their way into our dreams. If Munkustrap is connecting with Sillabub somehow from the Heaviside Layer, it’s possible he’s connecting with you through your dreams. Or through Sillabub.”

“So…” Tugger began, “You think she’s…”

“Yes. I do believe we may have another magic kitten on our hands!” Tantomile replied, a giddy grin on her face.

“Will you help us? Will you work with her? Help her learn to control it?” Demeter asked.

“Of course! I’d love to teach her! Oh, it’ll be like having a little sister! I’ve always wanted one!” Tantomile exclaimed.

Her excitement brought a smile to Demeter’s face. She was happy that Jemima would have a mentor, someone new to look up to. Coricopat and Tantomile were strange, to be sure. But they were kind, and responsible, and cared about each and every Jellicle. It even seemed as though when they were present, everyone felt safer for some reason. Like some odd comforting force enveloped the junkyard. There was no doubt about it. These cats were special.


	15. Chapter 15

Once their guests had left, Coricopat and Tantomile sat, discussing what they had talked about.

“Sillabub is such a special kitten.” Tantomile smiled.

“Yes…” Coricopat nodded, his face growing stoic. “Like her father…”

Tantomile frowned, putting her arms around her brother. “Oh, brother, I miss Munkustrap too. We all do. But yes. She is growing up to be so strong like him.”

“Not Munkustrap.” Coricopat looked at her. “You know who I’m talking about. Her  _ father, _ her…  _ Sire. _ ”

“... Don’t call him her father,” Tantomile replied gently, looking down and shaking her head, “That tom is  _ not _ a father. He is a beast. It takes so much more to be a father than simply siring a kitten. A father will  _ love _ his child, and  _ care _ for her, and protect her with his  _ life _ .  _ Munkustrap  _ is Sillabub’s father.”

“I’m… Sorry. I suppose I used the term rather literally. But…” Coricopat sighed, “It is still a very real concern.”

“Sillabub is nothing like him.” Tantomile shook her head stubbornly. There was nothing corrupt about Sillabub. She hadn’t an unkind bone in her little body.

“But she is of him,” Coricopat shot back with equal obstinance, “And we cannot ignore that. While we were outside, Sillabub confided in me that Munkustrap’s voice is not the only voice she has been hearing. There is another. The things it tells her are… Concerning, to say the least. Cryptic things that she couldn’t understand well enough to relay back to me properly. But what I have found is that this voice is telling her that it is her father. And it’s  _ not  _ Munkustrap. I believe that this is the voice of Macavity. She does not know him, but they  _ are  _ linked. By the magic that runs through both of their veins. Their blood magic. Macavity is trying to connect with Sillabub through their shared magical connection. We cannot let this happen, sister. We cannot ignore what is right in front of our noses.” He gave her a grave look. “Sillabub is in danger.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter this time! I'm just getting back into this fic after so long and I felt like this chapter came to a natural conclusion here!


	16. Chapter 16

Days later, not very far away from the junkyard, in the heart of London, sat an abandoned shipping warehouse near the docks of the River Thames. Inside were empty boxes and various sizes of metal debris from boats. In one corner was a metal barrel, which was currently on fire, keeping the inhabitants of the warehouse warm in the chill of the autumn night. 

In another corner was a pile of dead mice, some of which had been there for days. The far left and right corners at the back of the warehouse held variously sized flattened cardboard boxes, meant to be used for sleeping on.

And in the center of the place was a bed of many ratty old pillows and blankets. For a human passing by it would look like a pile of junk. But for a street cat, it was the height of luxury.

Dozens of cats prowled around the warehouse, hunting mice, or just pacing. Others fought over the freshest of the already dead mice in the pile, while the rest lounged about on or in the boxes. Nearly all of the cats were female. And almost all of them were terribly thin, so much so that you could see the shape of their spines. The ones that weren’t deathly thin were pregnant, kept well fed by the large tomcat who sat atop the bed of blankets and pillows. But he didn’t suppose he’d have to worry about the wellbeing of their kittens for much longer if he had his way.

The tom sat there with his eyes closed, speaking quickly and quietly to seemingly no one. “My darling baby, my little princess, I’m overjoyed that your abilities are blossoming forth so that we may finally communicate. I’m so proud of you. Someday, we will be reunited and I will show you all you could ever want. Be patient, little one.” Macavity broke out into an evil grin. “Papa will be seeing you very soon.”

***

“Hey, Jemmy, what’re you doin?” Pouncival asked, breaking Jemima from her quiet reverie.

Jemima glanced at him. “Listening to Papa.”

“What’s he sayin’?” Pouncival sat down and scratched his ear.

“That he’s happy I’m magic, and he’ll see me soon.”

Pouncival grinned. “Does that mean Munk’ll be reborn soon!?”

“I guess so.” Jemima shrugged.

“Cool! I can’t wait! He’ll be a kitten, like us!” Pouncival exclaimed, wagging his little triangle shaped tail.

“How do we know if it’s him?” Jemima tilted her head to the side.

“Well… My mommy says that kittens who come from another life remember some stuff from before! She says they mostly dream about it.” The two kittens sat in silent contemplation for a moment before Pouncival piped up again, “Wanna go play?”

“Yeah!” Jemima hopped up and the two of them scurried off.

“Don’t go too far!” Demeter called, watching them from outside her den.

Tugger sat near, atop a pile of trash, keeping a watchful eye over the junkyard. “Sure is a cute kid,” he commented, “She’s tough. Handling all of this super well.” Then he looked to her. “How are you holding up.”

“I’m…” Demeter’s voice shook. She was clearly holding back tears. “Doing the same… Every day is…  _ So _ difficult. I miss him at night especially. I miss him laying next to me, his arms wrapped around me, his chest rising and falling and I can feel his breath… It’s just… S-silent now… And I just…” That’s when she broke. She put her face in her paws and sobbed.

The scene pulled at Tugger’s heartstrings and he had to fight to keep from crying  _ himself _ . But he pushed the pain down and hopped off the pile, landing next to her. He sat down, pulling her into his arms. “I’m hurting too. It isn’t easy, staying composed. But… That’s my job now. As leader, I’m here for anyone who needs me. And right now… I think  _ you  _ need me.”

Demeter looked up at him, tears matting her damp fur. “I do…” she whispered, “Thank you, Tugger.”

“What are brothers in law for? Other than being the cool uncle and a  _ very  _ bad influence on your children.” He smirked.

“No,” Demeter shook her head, “You’re a  _ very  _ good role model for Jemima. She wants to be just like you, know that?”

Tugger tilted his head. “I… I didn’t. She said that?”

“Mm-hm! Munkustrap and I greatly encouraged it.” Demeter smiled.

Tugger was astounded. “... Munk did? But he always found me insufferable.”

“Oh, come on, Tugger, you had to know that most of that was for show. The  _ exaggerated sighs,  _ the throwing up of the arms, he was ribbing you! Munk knew that giving you attention only encourages you. If he  _ really  _ wanted you to stop, he would have  _ ignored _ you. Because wouldn’t it have gotten boring if he  _ had? _ ”

Tugger thought for a moment. Had Munkustrap really enjoyed his antics all along? “I suppose you’re right.”

“Besides, he had to act responsible. He had so much pressure on him, as your… Father’s heir. He was constantly afraid of losing the favour of the tribe. Any wrong move that could cause them to doubt his capability as a leader. He wanted to keep their respect.”

Tugger raised a brow. “What? But everyone loved him no matter  _ what _ .”

“I know that. And  _ you _ know that. But sometimes… I don’t think Munkustrap knew that…”

“... Huh.” All his life, Tugger had seen Munkustrap and thought he was all confidence. Nothing could shake him. But he never thought about what his brother was like behind closed doors, away from the prying eye of the cats who looked up to him, who staked all their hopes on him. When he was all alone with the ones he loved most.

Just then, Jemima bounded up to them. “Mommy, I’m hungry. Can I have a snack?”

Tugger sprang into action, standing up and putting his paws on his hips. “Well, well, have you never hunted before?”

Jemima shook her head.

Tugger smiled. “Looks like someone has to teach you! Whaddaya say? Want old uncle Tugger to show you the ropes?”

Jemima began hopping up and down excitedly. “Yeah yeah yeah yeah  _ yeah! _ ”

Tugger looked to Demeter for permission.

Demeter nodded with a smile.

“Try and keep up!” Tugger laughed, jogging ahead, but still going slow enough that Jemima wouldn’t fall behind.

Jemima giggled, running along behind him.

Demeter sighed. This was nice, seeing Jemima spend time with Tugger. With Munkustrap gone, it would be nice for her to have a strong male role model in her life.

***

Tugger and Jemima headed out of the junkyard and out to the streets of London. As they turned into an alleyway, Tugger noticed that Jemima had gotten quiet. “Penny for your thoughts?” he requested.

“What does that mean?” Jemima cocked her head to the side in confusion.

“What’s on your mind?”

“I’m listenin’ to Papa!” she grinned.

“Oh? What’s Papa sayin?” Tugger asked.

_ “Remeber, Jemima,”  _ the voice came to her,  _ “Our conversations are just for you and Papa.” _

Jemima looked apprehensive. “Can’t tell. It’s a secret!”

“Alright, alright. Your thoughts are your thoughts. I won’t pry.” Tugger smiled.

  
The voice spoke to Jemima once again.  _ “It won’t be long now, sweetheart. Papa can’t  _ **_wait_ ** _ to see you.” _


	17. Chapter 17

The next day was Jemima’s first session with Coricopat and Tantomile. She sat on the floor of their den, playing with a mess of yarn.

“So, Sillabub,” Tantomile began, “Other than speaking with your father, what else have you experienced?”

Jemima cocked her head. “Experienced?”

“You know, unnatural occurrences,” Coricopat clarified, “Magic!”

“Oh! Mama and I had the same dream! About Papa!”

“Can you tell me about the dream?” Tanto asked.

Jemima wagged her little tail. “We were in this big field with Papa on a sunny day! There were flowers  _ everywhere! _ Mama and Papa were talking but I couldn’t hear them. I was chasing a butterfly and rolling in the grass!”

“How did you feel during the dream?” Cori inquired.

“Happy! Calm. It was nice.” Jemima looked to her feet. “I usually only have bad dreams…”

Tanto was intrigued. “What do you usually dream about, Sillabub?” They had to find out all they could about Macavity’s possible influence on Jemima.

“The dark. Scary cats that I don’t know.”

Cori prodded further, “Where are you in these dreams? Do you ever recognize your surroundings?”

“Sometimes I’m on a boat,” Jemima responded, “And sometimes I’m in a big dark building. That’s where I see the scary cats. But I’m not me in my dreams. I look different. Like a big scary cat who looks kinda like uncle Tugger!”

Cori and Tanto shared a look for a brief moment before turning back to Jemima.

“Do you hear voices in these dreams?” Tanto asked.

Jemima nodded. “Sometimes. The voice of the big scary cat who’s me in the dreams. It’s low.”

Cori’s tail flicked. They were getting somewhere. “Do you ever hear this voice when you’re awake?”

Jemima hesitated. ‘ _ Papa told me not to tell when he sounds like that, _ ’ she thought. “... No…” she said, rather unconvincingly.

Tanto raised a brow. She’d speak with Cori about that later. For now, they had to keep Jemima out of the loop. Just until they knew exactly what was going on.

“I’m tired,” Jemima complained, “Can I go back to Mama and uncle Tugger now?”

Tanto sighed and looked at Cori. They weren’t going to get anywhere with her tired like this.

The twins nodded.

Cori took Jemima’s paw. “Let’s get you home, Silly.” He smiled.


End file.
